what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
