hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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