Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
