Walk of Shame. In a state park.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
