I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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