How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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