Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
