So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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