so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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