sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
How external is "for external use only"?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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