why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Randomize
