even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
