he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
