The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Text me some of your sweat
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