Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Let's paint friendship bongs
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
