Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
