just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
