Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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