If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize