Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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