Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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