The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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