windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My balls are so social today.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
