On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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