Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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