drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
