these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
