the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
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