Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
