ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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