people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize