Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize