i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Randomize
