Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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