i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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