I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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