i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize