ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
