I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
