Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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