Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
