i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
