Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
