I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
