Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
