i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm too high and old for this...
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
