things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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