Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
