Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
