I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Randomize
