hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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