Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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